I Hate That I Love You
by EmmaTheCo-Writer
Summary: I hate that my heart swells every time I see your face. I hate that every time I approach you with every intention of putting you in your place, I can't do it, and have to settle for some meager insult. I hate my possessiveness over you. I hate that I was forced to love you, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Most importantly, I hate that I love you, Bella Swan.
1. I Hate That I Love You

**Title: I Hate That I Love You**

**Fandom: Twilight**

**Rated: T**

**Pairing: Leah and Bella**

_**Summary: I hate that my heart swells every time I see your face. I hate that every time I approach you with every intention of putting you in your place, I can't do it, and have to settle for some meager insult. I hate my possessiveness over you. I hate that I was forced to love you, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I hate that I want to kiss those lips. Most importantly, I hate that I love you. I hate that I love you, Bella Swan.**_

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**Chapter 1.**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, **_  
_**besides these little plot bunnies!**_

**Warning: This is going to turn into a fem-slash story if I continue it, so if you don't like that sort of thing then it's not my problem, just don't read it. You have been warned.**

**Leah POV**

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I'm sitting down in a chair, as far away as I could possibly be from the others without actually leaving Sam and Emily's property. Why was I here? Well, it wasn't like I had a choice in the matter, usually I attempt to stay as far away from here as I possibly could while staying in La Push, but Sam had forced me to come here to _"interact"_ with the pack. It didn't seem possible with Embry, Quil, Jared, and Paul goofing off, not acknowledging my presence. _Yeah. Fuck you too, assholes..._

Their annoying behavior was suddenly put to a stop as the familiar sound of Jacob's bike was heard coming our way. It certainly took him long enough, now I can get the fuck away from here while he talks to Sam about how the talk with the leech went. To my immense displeasure, Jacob wasn't alone on that bike. He was accompanied by none other than Bella Fucking Swan herself. Before I could actually think of anything to say to her about coming here, my wolf was alerted to her arms wrapped around Jacob, this caused a low growl to irrupt from my throat.

_Mine._

I internally slapped myself. _No Leah, not yours. We decided that when we started fighting this Imprint in the first place. You hate her, you hate everything about her._ I could hear my wolf growling again as it replied to my thoughts. _No you don't hate her, you hate what she does to you._ l would never admit it out-loud, but my wolf was right. I didn't hate her; it was impossible. I hated what she did to me, what she made me feel.

As I collected myself from the internal argument with my wolf over our imprint, I was brought back to reality, and noticed that Jacob and Bella were now off of the bike, and standing in front of Embry, Quil, Jared, and Paul. "I'm glad you're here Bella," Embry started, "Maybe we can get a break from Jake's obsessive inner monologue." I rolled my eyes, but silently agreed, after all, when he thinks about her it in turn causes me to think about her, and that's something I'd rather not do.

Paul immediately jumped into the conversation, imitating Jacob horribly, "I wish Bella would call!" Jacob dryly laughed at that, while Jared continued, stopping gnawing on his chicken leg for two seconds, "I wish Bella wouldn't call!" Embry started after him, "Maybe I should call Bella?" He flashed a smile as Quil finished, "Maybe I should call Bella and hang up?" They quickly irrupted into giggles, and booming laughter. _Imbeciles._

Bella was warily smiling, and glanced up to meet my eyes. My scowl disappeared and she looked away as my heart raced inside my chest. _Damn it! I hate that my heart swells every time I see your face._ I thought, willing Bella to hear it, as Jacob attempted to cut off the packs giggles while sporting an embarrassed smile himself, "Alright, shut up now." I shook my head and stood up from my chair, walking down to where Bella and the pack were standing, glare firmly planted on my face.

Bella's head shot my way for a second, before she looked back to Jacob, "Bella this is Leah Clearwater, Harry's daughter." He stated firmly, as everyone silenced. Bella looked at me with genuine sympathy, "Hey. I'm really sorry about your father." My face softened a bit, and I wasn't able to tell her off like I had originally planned, "If you're here to torture Jacob some more feel free to leave." As I walked away I could see Bella flinch from the corner of my eye.

My heart felt a pang, and my wolf growled at me for hurting her. I continued on with the list of things that I hated that Bella Swan made me do, or feel. _I hate that every time I approach you with every intention of putting you in your place, I can't do it, and have to settle for some meager insult._ It was just another thought that she, or anyone else for that matter, would never hear as long as they lived.

Jacob slightly raised his eyebrows as he dryly commented, "Fun, isn't she?" Bella looked like she was about to say something to him as she frowned, but was cut off by my cousin, who was walking out of the house, Sam in tow, "Bella," She drawled out her name, "Hi!" Bella quickly replied back with a "Hey." As Emily sported a smile that looked like it would split her face in two.

Emily walked closer to Bella, that annoying smile still plastered to her face, "I was wondering when we'd see your face around here again." She stated as she hugged Bella. My wolf growled, upset that someone else was touching my mate. Worse, that someone I hated was touching my mate. _Mine_, my wolf growled. Bella's response was muffled, and quiet, "Yeah, same here." Another thing to add to that damn list. _I hate my possessiveness over you._

Jacob looked to Sam with a guarded expression, "Sam, we good?" I flinched at the name of my Ex, as Sam stiffly nodded, "We're good." I sighed after a moment. I knew that Sam had tried to fight the imprint, but as hard as he fought it hadn't worked. I also knew that I would end up giving in, but right now I was just going to be stubborn. Well, look at that, another thing to add to my mind list. _I hate that I was forced to love you, but I wouldn't trade it for the world._ Because when I did give in to this, I knew I wouldn't trade it away for anything.

Bella turned to look at me, pursing her lips. Her soft lips, that I wanted nothing more then to kiss. I'm going to have to write this fucking list down so I don't forget this shit... _I hate that I want nothing more then to kiss those lips._ There was a confused look on her face for a moment, probably wondering why I was standing on a hill outside Emily and Sam's house. I shot her a smirk, before jumping off the hill, phasing into my wolf form in mid-air.

My large head looked back towards her, and I saw her smile. A faint smile, none the less, but it was directed at me. My wolf was practically jumping for joy at the fact that we made her smile, and I now knew that I had to add one last thing to the list before the day is over. _Most importantly, I hate that I love you. I hate that I love you, Bella Swan, but I do, and I can't fight it any more._

This time, I wanted her to hear it.

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**A/N: What did you guys think? Hmm? It's possible that I might continue this as a story, but for now it's a one-shot. If you guys would like me to continue it, then I'd be happy to! Let me know if you think that I should and what you thought of it in your review!**

**Also, you could favorite and follow it just in case I do decide to continue! (Which I probably will XD) I hope you guys enjoyed!**


	2. Suddenly I Don't Care Anymore

**Chapter 2. Suddenly I Don't Care Anymore**

**Song Of This Chapter: The Kiss - Karmina**

_**Disclaimer: I promise you, I do not own Twilight or **_  
_**that song I mentioned by Karmina! I'm just using them!**_

**Warning: I'm only warning you once, since I'm continuing this story, I would like to state that this is fem-slash, if you don't like then quickly press the back button! You have been fairly warned. Along with that, there's kissing in this chapter!**

**Leah POV**

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That day. Maybe it was a couple days ago, I wouldn't be able to say. Anyways, that day a little while ago had changed everything. To be honest, the normal part of me, the human part of me that's usually the one in control, still hates the idea of giving into the imprint. But the wolf part of me just shoots back reasons as to why it would be a good idea, because _"we would have given in anyway"_ But then the human Leah will start being stubborn and say that _"we could hold out longer"_ and then the talk with Bella is delayed further.

I'm pretty sure arguing with yourself is a sign of insanity, but whatever, I turn into a giant wolf, and unwillingly fell in love with a girl that I hate, who just so happens to be dating a vampire; so what do I know about sanity?

Jacob's _"obsessive inner monologue"_ as Embry had put it, had told me that Bella was supposed to be visiting the reservation, well _sneaking_ to the reservation rather, since her leech had practically forced her to stay away from here, as if one of our kind would hurt her. _Yeah, Eddie, didn't your brother try to eat Bella on her birthday?_ Normal Leah chuckled darkly, while my wolf growled at the fact that I was mocking our imprint almost being eaten.

I took note that my wolf either referred to Bella as _"our imprint"_, _"our mate"_ or just the blunt, _"mine"_ Probably not the best things to call her when I see her again, I thought, rolling my dark eyes as I exited Emily and Sam's house, moving to sit in the same chair I was in last time. Once again, I wasn't here by choice, the fact that Bella was most likely going to meet Jacob here was just a bonus. I had to come here for a pack meeting concerning the red-headed leech, and patrol schedules.

An ugly red truck rolled into the driveway, and Jacob ran to greet Bella as she stepped out of the truck. My wolf growled, and normal Leah rolled her eyes, at what I wasn't sure of. I sided with my wolf on this one, and growled as I watched Jacob hug Bella. _Didn't you see her, like, three days ago? You're just trying to get lucky..._ I ranted to myself about Jacob, before following the rest of the pack to talk to Bella.

Bella took notice of me, and waved, "Hey Leah." I inclined my head towards her, "_Bella_." I greeted coolly, causing her to sigh and then turn to Jacob, "Can I talk to Leah? In private?" Jacob frowned, "Bella, I don't know if that's such a good idea-" He started, only to be cut off by Bella, "Jacob, I'll be fine." Jacob sighed and nodded, making me smirk, "Don't worry Jacob; I don't bite." He narrowed his eyes at me as Bella and I walked into the forest, out of their hearing range.

_So, you're in the woods, alone, with "our mate" where do you think that this is going to lead with wolfie over there acting like she's in heat?_ Normal Leah questioned teasingly, causing me to roll my eyes, and my wolf to growl. Bella cleared her throat, "Leah, can you tell me what's going on?" She questioned, causing me to cock my head to the side in a questioning mannor, "Ever since I saw you at the tribal meeting, I've been feeling... _Different_." She explained, seeming confused.

I rolled my eyes as she continued, "When you told me to leave a few days ago, I was sad, hurt even. Why?" Scoffing, I dryly replied, "Maybe it's just because you need everyone to stroke your ego." I flinched on the inside as I said it, and I noticed that Bella was now sporting a dejected expression on her face. A mad one quickly replaced it, and I could faintly hear Bella grinding her teeth together, "Well _fine_, if you're going to be like that then I'll just leave." She stated, turning to walk back to Emily's house.

I sighed, mumbling a string of curses under my breath before stopping her, "Bella wait. I'll explain." She hurriedly turned back to me, looking at me expectantly. I exhaled deeply, somewhat annoyed by the whole situation; this wasn't how I wanted to tell her, hell I wasn't sure if I wanted to tell her at all.

"How much did Jacob tell you about us?" I questioned, causing her to frown in what seemed to be confusion, "Just the basics really. A little while ago I went to the bonfire that you and Seth went to." She answered quickly. Of coarse I remembered that bonfire, it was the night I imprinted, and it was when my wolf started and normal Leah started annoying the fuck out of me, arguing with each other inside my head about Bella.

"Did he ever tell you about imprinting?"

Bella nodded, "Yeah, he didn't tell me much though, why?" Sighing, I explained, "Imprinting is when our wolf finds their soul-mate, someone that they need to be around, more often then not in a romantic way. We can't help who we imprint on, but we can try to fight it." A beat, "It just doesn't usually end well for the imprint or the wolf."

I moved to lean against a tree, while Bella thought over what I had just told her, "What does that have to do with anything?" She questioned, causing me to simply raise my eyebrows in response, waiting until it clicked. Bella's expression shifted to one of shock, "You imprinted on me, didn't you?" I nodded my head, "Then why do you act so mean to me?" I scoffed, "Bella, I don't want to be tied to you forever. I'm fighting this thing and playing nice would just make it worse. Besides, you have your _leech_."

That wasn't my original plan, but I'll be damned if I go down without some sort of fight, I'm not giving up my free-will that fucking easy. I could see Bella narrow her eyes slightly as she spoke, "I thought that you said that fighting it never ends well for anyone." I shrugged and pushed off of the tree, moving to stand next to Bella, "I did say that. But I also don't like you, and I'm pretty damn protective of my free-will, so unless you can give me something better then that..." I purposely trailed off, irritating her more.

Bella rolled her eyes, "Leah how can you be so cool about this! You just told me that we're soul-mates and you're trying to fight it?" She almost sounded desperate, most defiantly annoyed, "I don't believe in _soul-mates_," I spat out the word, "I believe in choice."

She sighed, "You're going to be stubborn about this aren't you?" She questioned, gaining a nod in response from me, "_Wonderful_." I rolled my eyes at her before replying, "Why do you even care, anyways? You have your leech, and Jacob, why do you need me to be your love-sick puppy? Literally."

Bella bit her lip.

I furrowed my brows, and crossed my arms over my chest, "Bella, what's going on?" Nothing. "Bella, you need to tell me why it's so important that I accept the imprint." Still nothing. "God damn it, Bella! Fucking answer me!" I wasn't angry, just annoyed, but my swearing got a reaction out of Bella, "It's important because when I said that I was feeling _'different'_ I meant that I couldn't kiss Edward without picturing you! I haven't felt the way I feel around you before, not even with Edward, and I need to know I'm not the only one feeling this!"

I was torn. The wolf part of me wanted to go hug our mate and tell her that it was okay, and that she wasn't the only one feeling like that. But, normal human Leah had no idea what to say, she just knew that it wasn't going to be that. I agreed with human Leah on this one, and was speechless.

Bella sighed, and wiped an offending tear away from her eye, "I knew coming out here was a bad idea." I narrowed my eyes, "This was your idea, what are you talking about?" She ignored me, and continued on with her rant, now starting to pace "And you're still going to fight it, even though we're meant to be." Those last tree words made me flinch slightly, those were the words that Sam said to me. _"We're not meant to be, Leah."_ He had spat out, before leaving me alone in the forest.

I growled at the thought of Sam, scaring Bella enough to cause her to pause mid-sentence and shoot me a questioning look. I shook my head, before letting a sigh escape my lips, "Come on, we should go." I stated, pointing to the tree-line, where the rest of my pack was.

As we started walking towards the edge of the tree-line, Bella turned back and grabbed my arm, "Wait, before we go back there, I want to try something." Before I could question what that _"something"_ was, Bella's warm lips covered mine, my immediate response was to stop, but I started kissing her back, her tongue brushing lightly against my bottom lip, begging for entrance, I responded by having my own tongue leave my mouth, and roughly enter hers, emitting a low moan from Bella.

_I told you._ Normal Leah mumbled dryly. I ignored her.

I could hear my heart racing, as well as Bella's, and as our tongues fought for dominance I knew that I had to pull away or I wouldn't be able to stop. Passion and desire burned within the kiss, Bella brought her hand up to caress my face, and I suddenly pulled away as if I had been burned.

Bella looked at me with hurt evident in her eyes, I pulled away, and growled, looking past her at a very pissed off Jacob, who was threatening to phase at any second. Bella's eyes followed my glare, and a gasp escaped her lips, "What the hell, Leah?" Jacob growled out.

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**A/N: Sorry for taking so long to update! In my diefence, I had my power out for a few days! Which sucked, a lot. I tried to make it up to you guys by having a kissing scene, and Jacob! What do you think is going to happen to Leah and Bella? And don't be fooled by Leah accepting the kiss, she's still as stubborn as ever!**

**Review, favorite and follow if you enjoyed this chapter!**


	3. I Don't Care What They Say

**Chapter 3. I Don't Care What They Say**

**Song Of This Chapter: Bleeding Love- Leona Lewis**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing! **  
**I swear, I just own my plot!**

**Leah POV**

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I could hear my heart racing, as well as Bella's, and as our tongues fought for dominance I knew that I had to pull away or I wouldn't be able to stop. Passion and desire burned within the kiss, Bella brought her hand up to caress my face, and I suddenly pulled away as if I had been burned.

Bella looked at me with hurt evident in her eyes, I pulled away, and growled, looking past her at a very pissed off Jacob, who was threatening to phase at any second. Bella's eyes followed my glare, and a gasp escaped her lips, "What the hell, Leah?" Jacob growled out. Bella stepped in front of me, putting her hand upward, with her palm facing Jacob, as if she were trying to walk around a wild animal.

_Well actually-_

Normal Leah's thoughts were cut off by a large growl emitting from Jacob's throat. He shoved Bella's arm away, and stalked over to me. I wasn't sure if I wanted to piss him off more, or try to explain. On one hand, he did just interrupt a nice make-out session, nearly hurt Bella, and is just really annoying in general. But on the other hand, I did just kiss the chick that he was crushing on. _Well, technically, she kissed you_. Normal Leah reminded me, wryly. And, I mean, it would be the nice thing to do.

I internally shrugged; I don't do nice anyways.

"Leah, answer me! What the hell was that?" He roared, his anger still very much alive. This time I actually did shrug, "Bella and I were practicing mouth-to-mouth resuscitation with each other." Their blank stares caused me to sigh; no one appreciated good sarcasm these days. "We were kissing Jacob, what the fuck did you think it was?" I'm not sure if he expected me to take it easy on him or not, but I'm going with "not", I mean, Bella isn't even dating him, she's dating the leech. And he's a leech, I don't do sympathy for leeches; leeches ruined my life. Twice. Once when Sam phased and imprinted, and twice when I phased and... and about the other part, I'm not really sure.

Jacob let a string of curses out from under his breath, before punching a thin tree; cracking it in half. I snorted. And the pack says that Paul and I need to control our temper. Yeah right, keep telling yourselves that. Jacob punches out trees, and Sam scars peoples faces; not a problem at all.

"First the leech, now _you_?" He questioned before looking down at the ground, probably not wanting an answer. I replied anyways, "Actually, the leech was first, then you, then me. Although, you and Bella had two kisses, both about two seconds long, and one resulted in her punching your face, so really, it's just the leech and I." Jacob glared up at me, and was about to say something when Bella interrupted him.

"Jacob, I thought we talked about this? You're my friend sure, I love you, but I'm not in love you with you." Jacob let out a growl, "What about Leah? Is she just a plaything to you? You love the leech, yet you're kissing Leah." Bella bit her lip. "Bella?" His voice was now softer. Bella glanced at me, seeming to be unsure. "You don't know what she is to you, do you? Bella, Leah hates you!"

I narrowed my eyes at him but stayed quiet. I don't hate Swan, I mean, I don't particularly like her, but I don't hate her. Bella glanced to me, hurt evident in her eyes, seeming to want me to object to Jacob's statement. I cocked an eyebrow, "Jacob who are you to say who I hate? How about I tell you who I hate, here's my list. I hate Sam, Emily, Paul, you most of the time, Seth occasionally, and mainly the rest of the pack, but I don't hate Bella." I made that list of things that I hate that she does to me, but I can't hate her. It's _impossible_.

I hate that she's making me fall for her. I hate that it's possible that I've already fallen for her. But I _don't_ hate her.

Jacob rolled his eyes, "Sure you don't, you love her." He replied sarcastically, and started talking again before I could reply. "What is with you two? Why were you kissing, and why are you defending each other?" Jacob and I locked eyes, "The only way that Leah'd do any of that was... Holy fuck. You fucking imprinted on her?" I didn't admit to imprinting on her, but I didn't deny it either.

He let out a harsh laugh, "Oh that's rich! You think that she's going to choose you just because you imprinted on her, don't you?" I growled at him, while he smiled un-comically, "You do! Well news flash, She-wolf, Bella loves the leech! She's going to die, and have sex with the leech, while you'll be left behind and forgotten." Normal Leah was amused by this, as she knew that it was impossible to resist an imprint, while my wolf was loudly growling and wanted to teach this jack-ass to not mess with me.

I snarled at him, while his smile turned sadistic. "You're going to lose again. You seem to have no luck in this _"love"_ thing at all, you know that?" That was all I could take, as I phased on the spot, jumping at him, my clothes became pieces of shredded fabric. Jacob was ready, and rolled out of the way, phasing into his wolf-form as well. I let my wolf take partiall control, aware that if I let it take full control it would probably seriously hurt Jacob.

_Your one to talk Black! The girl that you love would rather kiss me then you! Sucks, huh?_ I spat at him through our mind connection.

I snapped my jaws at him, and he growled in response. Bella's eyes widened, and she moved to stand in front of us, acting as a shield. For who, I wasn't sure of. "Stop. Please don't fight over me." She pleaded, causing a snort to emit from me. Bella shot me a glare, and Jacob looked at me questioningly. _It's just that it isn't really over Bella. Well for me it isn't, I mean, not fully anyway. I've been wanting to fight you basically every time you make some sort of annoying remark._ I explained to him in my head.

Jacob rolled his eyes, his body still in an attack position. _When does that ever happen?_ He asked, making me snort again. _Just about every time you speak._

He snapped at me, and Bella looked at him with widened eyes, causing him to back down. "Can you guys, uh, turn back?" She questioned, looking from Jacob to me, and then back to Jacob. I got an idea in my head immediately after, and if I was in human form there would have been a devilish smirk on my lips. Jacob's eyes widened, well, as much as they could in Wolf form. _Leah don't-_ His thought was cut off by me shifting back into human form.

Bella looked away from Jacob to my side, where I was standing in my human form. Naked. A smirk on my lips. Jacob growled, and ran for the tree-line; he was probably going to Sam's to borrow a pair of shorts. Bella's eyes practically bulged out of her head, as she locked her eyes on my nude form. My smirk widened as I cleared my throat. "My eyes are up here." Bella snapped out of her trance, and met my eyes with a seriously red face.

Seconds later a human Jacob appeared, fully clothed, with a bra and shorts in his hand. He threw them at me, and he along with Bella adverted their eyes. I glanced at the clothes in my hands. Plain black bra,a black strap-shirt and jean shorts; probably Emily's, she never really was known for her desire to be anything more then plain. With a roll of my eyes, I quickly hauled the items on, and looked over to Jacob and Bella, who were both still staring at the ground.

I scoffed, "You can look now." Both were hesitant to look up, afraid that I was still going to be naked, I assume.

I crossed my arms over my chest, and Jacob sighed. "Can someone help me understand this for a second? Leah imprinted on Bella, but Leah still seems like, well, Leah. She isn't an imprint zombie like every else is." I shook my head. "Your guess would be as good as mine. The only thing that I can figure would be because of my past experience with imprinting it affects me differently."

He nodded, but Bella but her lip. "What if it's different because you're the first woman to turn? I mean, you are right?" I rolled my eyes and nodded. Jacob shifted his body nervously, "So if Leah imprinted on you, that means that you and Leah are soul mates... not you and Edward, and not you and me." Bella nodded, and Jacob ran a hand through his short hair, "Where do you guys go from here? I mean, you kissed, what did it feel like? Did it match what Bella had with Edward, and what Leah had with Sam? Or was it better then that?"

Bella sighed, "It's difficult to explain. Especially when the person you're trying to explain your feelings for is standing next to you." I rolled my eyes, but said nothing. "It was... _different_. It wasn't like anything I've ever felt before, and, I mean, do I even have a choice with this? And why are you being to chill about this all of a sudden?" Jacob laughed, causing me to raise my eyebrows, and Bella to widen her eyes.

"Bells, that's the thing, with imprinting it isn't about choice, because you're going to want to be with them anyway, they're meant for you; it's basically a match made in heaven. As for why I'm not extremely pissed off at Leah, well I _do_ want what's best for you Bells, I _always_ have, I just thought that the best for you was me. But Leah imprinted on you! It changes everything. Plus, even as much as it would hurt my ego to lose the girl to another girl, at least this way you'll still be alive, and well, you."

Bella nodded, and Jacob weakly smiled before walking back towards the direction of Sam and Emily's house. Leaving me pondering over what he said. _This changes everything_. And it really did, now that my imprinting on Bella was out in the open, the wolves would soon know, and then Edward would know, and that's when I'll be fucked. I can deal with that when the time comes, because as much as I'd like to think that there's a chance that she'll chose him at the same time I don't want it to happen, and I know that it's next to impossible.

Jacob's words echoed in my head. Where _do_ we go from here?

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**A/N: Sorry for the extremely long wait! I'll do better next chapter, I promise! This chapter was kind of difficult for me, since I don't want Jacob to overact or underact, but I wanted him to come to an understanding that it would be better for Bella to end up with Leah and be alive then end up with Edward and be, well, dead.**

**Anyways, if you enjoyed this chapter then don't forget to review, favorite, and follow for more! See you readers next chapter!**


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